Sex Play
2 1/2 years:
Child shows interest in different postures of boys and girls when urinating and is interested in physical differences between the sexes.
3 years:
Verbally expresses interest in physical differences between sexes and in different postures of urinating. Girls attempt to urinate standing up.
4 years:
Extremely conscious of the navel. Under social stress may grasp genitals and may need to urinate. May play the game of "show." Also verbal play without eliminating. Calling of names related to elimination. Interest in other people's bathrooms. May demand privacy for self, but extremely interested in bathroom activities of others.
5 years:
Familiar with, but not too much interested in, differences between sexes in body structure. Less sex play and game of "show." More modest an less exposing self. Less bathroom play and less interest in unfamiliar bathrooms.
6 years:
Marked awareness of an interest in differences between sexes in body structure. Questioning. Mutual investigation by both sexes reveals practical answers to questions about sex differences. Mild sex play or exhibitionism in play or in school toilets. Game of "show." May play hospital and take rectal temperatures. Giggling, calling names or remarks involving words dealing with elimination functions.
7 years:
Less interest in sex. Some mutual exploration, experimentation and sex play, but less than earlier.
8 years:
Interest in sex rather high, though sex exploration and play is less common than at six. Interest in peeping, sexual jokes, provocative giggling. Children whisper, write or spell elimination or sex words.
9 years:
May talk about sex information with friends of same sex. Interest in details of own organs and functions. Seek out pictures in books. Sex swearing, sex poems beginning.
10 years:
Considerable interest in sexual jokes.
Child Sexuality
At Birth:
Capacity to have an erection (male)
Capacity for vaginal lubrication (female)
All sex organs present
In males testes may or may not be descended into scrotum
During First Year:
Show genital guarding
Manipulate own genitals
Orgasm in boys from 5 months
Orgasm in girls from 4 months
Two Years:
Rebelliousness, un-cooperative, fiercely independent
Know their own mind
Differences between males and females
Male or female gender identification is fixed
Interest in posture of males and females when urinating
Is interested in physical differences between the sexes
Learns to name body parts
Capacity to fantasize
Loves rituals regarding bedtime, bath, meals, and story time
Emotionally stormy
Don't want anyone to touch their buttocks
Develops positive and/or negative attitudes toward elimination and urination depending on toilet training
Self-esteem and trust in others first established
Three Years:
Pleasant, initial shyness
Girls attempt to urinate standing up
Plays at adult male - female roles
Continues to masturbate
Four Years:
Bathroom slang and name calling - "pooh face," "shit head"
Interested in peeking at others eliminating and urinating
May demand privacy for self
Plays "nurse - doctor - patient" games with peers, plays hospital and takes rectal temperature
Enjoys nudity
Aware of gender and sex roles
Boys scornfully chauvinistic
Continues to masturbate
Five through Seven Years:
Reinforcement of gender identity continues
Identification with same sex parent strengthens
Mutual body exploration with same sex is common
Sexually oriented daydreams and fantasies
Feelings toward opposite sex begin to become more ambivalent
Eight through Twelve Years:
Best friend or buddy common
Peer group begins to dominate in identity seeking
Beginning of separation process from parents
Early menstruation begins in some girls, secondary sex characteristics develop
Strong feelings of modesty begin to be expressed
From Thirteen Years:
Puberty and resultant body changes proceed in boys and girls
Menstruation occurs in almost all girls by age 16
Ovulation established in girls 18 - 24 months after menarche
Usually estrangement from parents as sexual authority figures becomes more pronounced
Masturbation and sexual fantasies become integrated and common, especially among males
Sexual attraction of the opposite sex becomes stronger
Mood swings develop in body image from extremely self-critical to overly vain
More attention is paid to personal appearance and dress
Sex role expectations begin to be acted out according to culturally established patterns (dating, petting, etc.)
What Children Should Know Before Starting School
Correct names of Sexual Parts.
Correct words of elimination.
Understand the basic fact of baby's growth within the mother.
Know enough anatomy to understand the difference between boys and girls.
If child wants to know and asks, she/he should understand that babies are made by fathers and mothers together.
Thank you Child Assault Prevention Training Center Of Northern California.